A Brother for My Girls

I started this blog in August 2010 with my first post announcing that we were in the process of adopting again from Ethiopia. Well, today, I am happy to announce that after nearly a year of officially waiting, we have accepted the referral of a four-year old boy! Since he is not yet legally our son, I am not able to give any details. Let’s just say he is quite handsome. As with Semira, we won’t be changing his name. He already has a nice name and I am sure he knows it well! For now, let’s call him “K.” 

Lily and Semira are excited to finally get a brother. G-d knows we have been talking about it for a long time in the Prager household. They are very excited that he is younger than them. Lily, especially, likes to be a mother hen so she is looking forward to helping K learn the ropes. Semira is also excited to have someone with whom to share her Ethiopian heritage. And Steve will finally get a testosterone boost from having another male in our household.

A lot has changed with Ethiopian adoptions since 2008. When we adopted Semira, we received a referral and, less than two months later, we were in Ethiopia picking her up. The process is not so quick anymore. From here, we will wait until mid-October when the Ethiopian courts re-open following the rainy summer season. Then our case will be submitted to the court and when all the paperwork is adequate, we will be assigned a court date. Our best guess is that it will be in/around January sometime. This time, both parents must appear in court in Addis Ababa on the assigned date. During this trip, we will meet K, but we will leave him and return to the U.S. 

After the Ethiopian courts issue a final court decree, K will legally be our son. Then our case is submitted to the U.S. Embassy. The embassy then completes its own investigation. When it is satisfied that K meets the legal definition of an orphan and all the proper paperwork is in place, they will invite us to return to Addis Ababa for a visa interview. So yes, we must go to Ethiopia twice this time. Generally, the time between the two trips is 2 to 4 months (if we don’t encounter any bumps in the road along the way).

We are planning to take Lily and Semira with us on the first trip. The adoption related business will take about a week and we intend to travel around Ethiopia for another week or so. We have promised Semira for a long time now that we would take her back to Ethiopia. She misses it a lot. Plus, the girls will get to meet K for the first time with us! Lily was very instrumental in helping Semira become part of our family; we're sure that Lily and Semira will do the same for K. For many reasons, it just wouldn’t be right to leave them at home. We will most likely leave them here for the second trip (which will be all - well, mostly - business and shorter). I am hopeful that maybe two awesome grandmothers will volunteer to come watch the kids for a week. (Hopefully they are both reading this)!

Needless to say, we are excited! We are also nervous at the same time. We know from experience that you just don’t walk off a plane with a new child and go back to family life as normal. There is a fairly serious adjustment period with a lot of laughter and tears along the way. For now though, I want to savor this movement of excitement. Getting the call for the second time was just as good as the first!

Our Visitor & Houseguest

Muluneh, with the kids and me in front of our house

For the last month, we have had a houseguest. His name is Dr. Muluneh Abshare and he is a geography professor at Addis Ababa University. Now you might be thinking that houseguest for a month can be a drag. Au contraire mon ami, this experience was far from it. In fact, it was pretty darn delightful! So before I tell you about our experience, let me tell you about how we got to this point by telling you how we met Muluneh.

In 2008, when we adopted Semira, Steve made the decision that he would shift his developing academic research focus from Tanzania to Ethiopia. The move made perfect sense. He wanted to cultivate relationships in Ethiopia so that we would have opportunities as a family to live and work there at some point in the future. It was all part of a long-term plan to stay connected to Semira’s homeland. Steve started by emailing a bunch of professors to introduce himself and to arrange a meeting. Low and behold, Muluneh responded.

The gates of Addis Ababa University (above) and Steve in front of the building that houses the Geography Department (below) in 2008

In April 2008, Steve, Lily, and I walked onto the campus of Addis Ababa University and found the Geography Department. Muluneh was the chair at the time. We had a nice meeting where strangers introduced themselves and plans were hatched. For all Muluneh knew, Steve could have been typical of the many people who attempt to start up international collaborations by making all kinds of pie in the sky promises that amount to little. But Steve isn’t like that... Steve and Muluneh quickly orchestrated the signing of a memorandum of agreement between the University of Wyoming and Addis Ababa University. Shortly thereafter, Muluneh invited Steve to come give a short course and we used many of our frequent flyer miles to send him to Ethiopia so he could teach for the department in Addis.

The rest is history… Steve has been back five times since our inaugural 2008 visit, teaching another month long course and doing field research with both students from Wyoming and local Ethiopian geography students. Steve has many true friends over there and the the Department of Geography and Environmental Studies at AAU is definitely his second academic home.

This fall, Steve decided to try and bring Muluneh to the United States as a visiting scholar at the University of Wyoming for a portion of his sabbatical leave. This meant that Muluneh would give a few talks and seminars then work on his own research. Money is always an issue when doing these types of things so we needed to find an inexpensive place for Muluneh to stay. Long story short, Château Prager quickly became the best option. Our house is not huge, so having Muluneh here meant he would be in the thick of things. There is no vacant wing of our house; practically every space is used all the time. And we have our nutty dogs, Mattie and Biggie, to contend with.

The experience was fantastic! Our family had an entire month to show Muluneh life in the U.S. and in return, we had time to have many conversations about life in general, politics, economics, and culture -- a sort of compare and contrast of life in two very different places. The best thing for me was spending a month having to really think about why we do some of the things we do and trying to explain the rationale to someone from a completely different culture. When I say “we” not only do I mean our family on a personal level, but Americans in general. Coming up with these explanations is not all that easy! These conversations definitely took me out of autopilot mode for a month.

We also wanted to show Muluneh the beautiful landscapes that we are so blessed with here in Wyoming and the surrounding areas. We enjoyed hiking the Turtle Rock Trail at Vedauwoo and a day trip to the Snowys (along with pizza at the Bear Tree). Muluneh also joined us and four other families over Labor Day weekend for our annual camping trip to Rocky Mountain National Park in Colorado. Needless to say, I think he was impressed by what he got to see. Who wouldn’t be?

Emerald Lake hike at Rocky Mountain National Park...ugly, huh?

On a cultural note, we hosted a fairly large Ethiopian New Year’s party on Sunday, September 11 with our Laramie friends and students with connections to Ethiopia. Lastly, Muluneh a attended services at three different Laramie churches and even accompanied us to Shabbat last Friday to check out what the Jews do.

Muluneh getting to eat some Ethiopian food in Wyoming

Steve made another amazing vegetarian feast for our friends, some of whom are seen below

Yes, it was a busy month! But instead of being burdened by having a guest and all that comes with it, we embraced it. When it was time to say our good byes, we were all genuinely sad to see Muluneh go. Even the kids, who had grown accustomed to engaging him in their own conversations and enjoying his company, were quite touched by his departure.

Not knowing how Muluneh would perceive his time amidst the chaos that we call home, I could only hope that Muluneh enjoyed his stay with us. After all, one can never be sure exactly what the person on the receiving end is experiencing. The night before he left, Muluneh thanked us for the hospitality and for welcoming him into our family. He said the experience was more than he wished it to be or could have even imagined. I was humbled! It is people like Muluneh who will make our future year-long sabbatical in Ethiopia a great one. Who knew that a chance email in 2008 would lead our family to amazing new friends and colleagues from across the globe. Thanks Muluneh!

Puerto Viejo, Costa Rica

Punta Uva Beach

Our time in Puerto Viejo can be summed up like this: beach, rescue animals, and chocolate. In addition to beach time and snorkeling, we visited the Jaguar Rescue Center and spent most of another day exploring how chocolate is made Caribbean style. Puerto Viejo is in southern Costa Rica on the Caribbean just north of the Panama border. The Caribbean side of Costa Rica is somewhat different culturally than the rest of the country. It is definitely more colorful! It has a pretty big Rastafarian and hippie influence. It is a great place to spend a week. The beaches are clean and the water is clear. The food is good and there is a lot to do.

We had the pleasure of visiting the Jaguar Rescue Center. The center is a rescue and rehabilitation place for local animals. It is owned and operated by an Italian couple who have a passion for helping animals and educating people about them. The center started with mostly reptiles. Now it is full of monkeys, sloths, frogs and birds. We learned that it takes two years to rehabilitate a monkey and return it to the wild because the orphaned monkeys need to be accepted into a troop in order to survive and thrive. The sloths, on the other hand, fly solo so they are released as soon as they are physically able to go. The animals are brought here by local residents when they are injured. Many monkey and sloth injuries are from dogs, cars, and power lines. While we had already seen plenty of monkeys and sloths in the wild in Costa Rica on our previous trip, this visit was really special because we learned so much about how proximity to people can hurt these animals and the dedicated efforts by compassionate people to help them.

Our volunteer guide with one of the residents

Monkey parts...many monkeys taking a late morning nap together

A two toed sloth

Some of the many orphaned baby sloths

A few days after our visit to the wildlife center, we decided to explore the world of cacao. Our chocolate tour was the result of a collaborative effort between two NGOs (called Global Creek at Mango Walk) and Caribeans a local small batch coffee roaster and chocolateer. The two NGOs are non-profit operations that study the local jungle with a particular focus on issues related to the cacao trees. They are very interested in sustainability, ecological issues, and social responsibility. Volunteers pick the cocao pods and dry the beans. Caribeans, run by husband and wife Minnesota transplants, makes chocolate from only pure cacao and organic sugar...no other ingredients! I am not sure I have ever eaten chocolate with only two ingredients.

Cacao pods on a tree

Cacao beans drying out after fermentation

The original "chocolate" drink...a drink with subtle chocolate flavor and cayenne

My father-in-law Bob and Steve trying out our spicy drinks

My mother-in-law Bev enjoying the tasting part of the tour with the kids


The inside of a cacao bean. The beans are slimy and sweet before they are fermented and dried. The gooey stuff around the bean tastes like sweet tarts.

The humble kitchen area of Caribeans chocolate making operation

Overall, we walked away a great deal more informed about cocoa and the complexity of making chocolate. The tour was a fantastic, educational, and tasty experience. We heartily recommend this to anyone visiting the area!

Guanacaste, Costa Rica

Lily and Semira in Tamarindo

The Prager family just returned from a two week vacation in Costa Rica. This is our second time there in the last year. We also went last December for two weeks. Obviously, we really loved it... Otherwise, why go back? This time, my wonderful in-laws joined us and we ventured out to different parts of the country. With the exception of a couple of transition days, we spent our time on the coasts - the first week in the Guanacaste area (north Pacific) and the second week on the Caribbean.

We were amazingly fortunate with respect to the weather. This is the "green season" in Costa Rica which means rain (and, potentially, a LOT of rain). Luckily, we experienced most of the rain in the afternoons and evenings. We didn't have many long stretches and no one entire day was completely rained out. The rain is actually really nice because it cools things down and is a nice break from the sun. I gave up sun worshiping long ago and actually enjoy days when the sun disappears for a while.

Since we saw so much, it's useful to write about our travels in parts again. Overall, we really enjoyed the new places we visited. The highlights were definitely swimming everyday and wildlife viewing. We are not really lay on the beach all day types so the diversity of activities in Costa Rica makes it a really fun place to go.

Our first stop was Playa Hermosa, a quiet little beach on the north Pacific. Here we had the chance to swim and snorkel. We met some guy with a boat on the beach who took us out one day. Surprisingly the kids decided to try it. I was not surprised that Semira was up for the adventure. But Lily is a bit more tentative about these type of things. So Steve and I had the pleasure of swimming around with kids clinging onto our backs looking for fish. It was a bit tiring, but fun to see the kids get excited about seeing creatures under the sea.

Steve and Semira in snorkel attire

The snorkeling spot was in a little cove off an island a couple of kilometers from the beach. The water was very clear, and we saw octopus, starfish, a variety of different tropical fish and schools of little fish. One really cool think is the sound. The underwater currents make a very cool clicking sound as you are diving around. Overall, it was a super time.

My father-in-law Bob

After snorkeling, the boat captain took us to another beach that also served as something of a wildlife preserve. There, the beach was soft, clean sand and just off the beach were a few monkeys relaxing in a forest of big mango trees. It was hilarious to look at the ground, it was literally covered in mango pits - needless to say, the monkeys have a good food supply.

A howler monkey...when a troop gets going, they make the coolest sounds that you can hear a mile away

The boat excursion was fun, but it was also fun just to relax and hang out. It did rain a bit, so some relaxation was "mandatory" (so to speak). SO, just what does one do on a rainy afternoon? Well, for one, just sit and listen. Tropical rains are so intense...often with no lightening or thunder, just pounding rains. It is really cool. Of course the kids really didn't mind. All they needed was an umbrella and they were off on an adventure.

After Playa Hermosa, we headed to the southern Caribbean. Driving in Costa Rica is slow going so the thought of a ten hour day in the car was not appealing to anyone. Instead, we stopped halfway in La Fortuna for the night. We stayed in La Fortuna for four days in December so I was mostly interested in relaxing in the hot springs. The rain made it a perfect day for such a thing.

La Fortuna is a really fantastic place to visit. It is at the foot of the beautiful Arenal volcano and hosts an amazing diversity of forests, plant species, and wildlife. Not to mention, there are virtually unlimited recreational opportunities ranging from zip lines to hiking to rafting. That and, of course, some serious fun riding the slides in the hot springs!

Where Did the Year Go?

Ringing in summer with the annual filling of the hot tub with bubbles before draining (a big highlight if you are seven years old)

It is hard to believe the school year is over! It just blew by. At times it was stressful, but overall, things went really well. The kids have really grown up, both physically and intellectually. I have a lot to be thankful for. While I wish the school year was longer overall, I was definitely ready for a schedule break. I am not a morning person so having some extra time to get the kids from point A (being bed) to point B (being school) is welcome. The kids were also ready. Summer is all about not having homework, wearing play clothes, swimming, riding bikes, going to the park, staying up later, and sleeping in. Wyoming summers are so short so every day matters!

First day of school (above) and the last day of school (below)

Lily really enjoyed first grade. Aside from one big meltdown regarding the Principal’s Honor Roll this spring, all things academic were good. Lily has turned into an amazing reader and stellar mathematician this year. She also started playing violin. Lily can be shy in certain situations so I am amazed that being on stage playing violin in front of people doesn’t seem to bother her.

Semira acclimated really well to Snowy Range, which kind of surprised me. I had only one phone call this year from her teacher. I have to say I was expecting more. At the beginning of the year, I was unsure as to whether we made the right decision by having Semira in kindergarten again. (Last year, she did K at the Open School). By November, I knew we made the right decision. Instead of feeling like the kid who didn’t get it, she emerged as a leader in her class. This gave her a new sense of confidence that she is a smart little girl.

Lily's first group recital

Semira at her kindergarten graduation

This summer the kids will be going to the Open School for seven weeks so we can work. We will be heading to Costa Rica (again) for two weeks in July/August. I must say we are all looking forward to that! Steve is also trying to squeeze in another quick trip to Ethiopia to get two students started on some research. Then it will be two weeks of Camp Israel then back to school! Even though we try every year to have a relaxed summer with little planned, it never seems to work out that way. I have come to realize that our family motto is “Work Hard, Play Hard.”

One very interesting note is that the kids are REALLY into each other so far this summer. Ever since they have been out of school, they have had sleepovers (sharing Lily's top bunk) just about every night! It's nice to see them appreciate each other and, at the end of each day, automatically suspend any grievances, disagreements, or quarrels.

So, work hard, play hard, and enjoy each others' company. You only go around once, so try and do it with a smile!

Closure and Celebration

The Official Moment!

After five plus years of plugging along, I earned my education doctorate degree in December. I must admit that I was ready to be done. Working on this degree was different than my previous college experiences because I am older, have small children, and work. Needless to say, I had a divided mind, focusing in fits and spurts over a long period of time. Plus earning a doctorate is different than a master’s degree. It is a marathon rather than a sprint. And just when you are tired and beat up, you have to muster the energy to keep going. No one is there to tell you what to do and when. As a result, a high level of self-determination is needed to cross the finish line.

Now that I am done, people ask me what I am going to do with this degree. Well, the simple answer is I have no plan. Someday, it will probably come in handy as a minimum qualification for a job. But other than that, it has not changed my world. The thing about living in a university town and working at a university is you start to think having a PhD is normal. After all, almost everyone you meet has one. It’s definitely warped thinking! The other question people ask (as a joke) is whether I became any smarter. Well, hopefully I learned something along the way! However, I consider myself more of a “blue collar” academic. I am not some brilliant thinker like many people I know. But when push comes to shove, I can hang in this environment. Perhaps my strength is that I really like to learn new things and challenge myself mentally. It keeps me from becoming uninformed, stagnant, cynical, and lazy. Plus, the older I get, the more I realize how much I don’t know. It has taken nearly 20 years to realize how naïve I was when I first graduated college.

I was ambivalent about walking at graduation this weekend, but decided the celebration would be a nice way to put closure to my experience. Actually, Steve talked me into it - I did the same to him when he graduated with his PhD ten years ago. Plus my parents were excited to come watch me! All in all, it was a fun weekend. The adults might have been impressed, but the kids were not! They were bored. The fun part for me was walking near the front of the line just behind the faculty and getting a front row seat to boot. I guess this was the perk, along with wearing the cool robe and hat. Hurray for me!

Posing with the family: With my awesome husband and kids (above) and my mom and dad (below)